My skin crawls sometimes
A burning unease
Buzzing like tattoo needles
Etching in my sins
Just below the surface
Just out of sight from everyone else
Taunting
Unsettled pacing
My hands pulling through my hair
My fingers pounding at the keys
Tears tightrope across my lashes
My soul aflame
My heart a kick drum rhythm
Aching
Play with me
I beg
Weak
And needy
Desperate for quiet
A quiet that hovers just out of reach
Always
Just below the surface
Just out of sight from everyone else
A screaming specter only I can see
Threatening me
I can’t get free
Play with me
And when he does
I beg
Weak
And needy
Push me further
Make it hurt
More
Quiet the burning and buzzing
That you can’t hear
That you don’t see
Break me please
Make me free
And then
Sometimes
The quiet comes unexpectedly
Minus the pain
Before I ever beg
Sometimes it’s all washed away with a whisper
Make them sick with wanting to know what that feels like
For just a moment
Without a struggle
I’m set free
*inspired by the photo quote above – words of encouragement written to me from a friend.
allison writes 